would it make me feel any better? More loved or cared for? Oh, sure there would be there that momentary thrill at being so popular. The ego stroking that comes from thinking I have something to say that others might want to hear. After all, that is why most of us are here in blogland, seeking attention, approval, little daily or weekly ego boosts.
Be truthful now, you know you do it. The minute that email pings into your inbox telling you someone has liked your post or commented on it, or sheer bliss a new follower, your fingers are already sliding the mouse over the tab with your blog on it. Within seconds you have the stats page up just to experience that little somebody likes me glow.
It doesn’t last long though and as time goes on it is harder to feel that little tingle. You need more likes, more reads, more followers to get that boost. But it’s not happening, there are so many people out there with so little time. we have to be choosy, can’t read everybody’s posts so some days yours get missed. What do you do for the love then?
Well, you learn to love yourself, not to stroke your own ego but to deeply appreciate the gifts and talents you have. To recognise and accept your weaknesses and love yourself anyway.
Not an easy thing to do, and something I have had great difficulty with but I am gradually getting there. My regular followers will notice that I have been posting less, and part of that is because I don’t feel the need anymore to grasp at straws, to seek fake adulation and love. Sure, some of you out there care about me, but a lot of you are just reading this and pressing like in the hopes that I and others who read my blog will find and read yours too, because you too are just like me.
The small child inside is crying out for the love and attention it he/she didn’t get enough of. It is making up for lost time. We don’t need strangers, however well-meaning, to do this for us. You can do it for yourself. Let your child out to play, Pay him/her some attention today, you will feel better for it.
I have had a tough couple of weeks so yesterday decided I needed some relaxation I waited until the children were all at school and then ran a bath, filled to the brim, covered in bubbles, something I was never allowed as a child. I brought a book in but never got around to reading it.
On a shelf above the bath were an assortment of coloured bath ducks which the children have long grown out of but still won’t let me throw away. They looked so appealing, that I flipped them, one by one, off the shelf into the bath. One was slightly larger than the others so I made her Mommy Duck and proceeded to line them up on the edge of the bath as I used to do for the children and sang “Five little ducks went over the hills and faraway” sending one duck at time down to the other end of the bath while Mommy Duck looked on.
A rather silly way to spend half an hour you may think, but it felt good, the child in me was given the attention she needed, the adult got a nice relaxing bath at the end of which I warm. stress free and ready to get on with my day.
Next time you find yourself checking your stats, ask yourself why? If you make money from your blog, well yeah, I can see you want to keep an eye on those figures but for the rest of us, seeking ego boosts is there another way you can find that little glow? What can you do for yourself right now that will make you feel good?
Leave the stats page and do it, however childish or silly it may seem, if it makes you feel good just do it.